Peter's Birthday Present
by pie and cactus
Summary: Peter receives a gift from Sirius that causes more trouble than it's worth.


Peter birthday present

Peter's Birthday Present

Genre: Humor

Rating: PG-13

Length: 35٨٥ words

Time: The Marauders' sixth year

Characters: The Marauders, some Lily

Summery: Peter receives a gift from Sirius that causes more trouble than it's worth.

Beta: WargishBoromirFan

Disclaimer: All the characters belong to J.K. Rowling

Remus snapped his head up from the book he was reading when the door to the room burst open, banging against the wall loudly. He was not at all surprised to see Sirius standing in the doorway, looking very smug. A huge grin was plastered across his handsome face, and he had a new sparkle in his eyes.

Remus sighed to himself, and knowing the chances that Sirius would allow him to continue reading were slim, closed his book.

"I have the perfect birthday present for Wormtail," announced Sirius, walking towards his own bed.

"What is it?" asked Remus, knowing that Sirius wanted him to ask, but not really expecting an answer. Especially if the present involved some sort of rule braking.

"I'm not telling, Moony, sorry. It still needs work, but it'll be ready for Wormtail's birthday," said Sirius, pulling his broom from under his bed.

"I'm giving him a big box of Chocolate Frogs, Cauldron Cakes, and Pumpkin Pasties," said Remus.

"That's what you give him every year." Sirius smiled on his way out, "but that's what he likes, I suppose. Prongs said he's giving him a set of chessmen; he'll have his own, finally."

"Good idea," said Remus to the empty room, as Sirius didn't bother staying to hear his answer.

Remus's brow furrowed. Since when aren't James and Sirius buying Peter, or anyone else for that matter, a gift together?

Remus sighed again, hopping against hope that Sirius wasn't going to give Peter some awful and dangerous present that he actually wanted to get himself. Luckily, he didn't have to wait too long to find out what was on Sirius's mind – Peter's birthday was only a three days away.

"Happy birthday!" the three boys congratulated the sleepy Peter in unison on the morning of his birthday.

"Here's my present." James handed Peter a badly wrapped parcel from his trunk.

Peter, a little surprised by James' use of the word 'my' instead of 'our', only said "thanks, Prongs" in an excited voice, and immediately opened the package.

"Wow, my very own chess set!" he exclaimed.

"Now you won't have to borrow Moony's all the time," said James kindly.

"Yeah, and maybe these ones will like you better than Moony's do and you could actually win a game once in a while," added Sirius and everyone laughed.

"Here's mine, but I expect it's not really a surprise." Remus threw his gift to Peter.

Smiling and thanking Remus, Peter opened the second parcel and handed some sweets to his friends. Only Sirius refused to take any and Peter raised his eyebrows in question. As if it wasn't odd enough that Sirius was up so early in the morning.

"I want to see your expression when you'll get my gift," said Sirius with a devilish smile. "Here you go," he said and passed Peter a small piece of parchment.

"Ah… thanks, Padfoot," Peter examined the parchment that had only one word written on it. "What is it exactly?" he asked when Sirius didn't volunteer to explain his gift.

That was all Sirius was waiting for. "That's the answer to your dreams," he smirked, "a spell I invented myself."

"Oh, no," sighed Remus. Sirius always got him worried. At least when James was involved, no matter how much trouble they caused together, one could count on him to hold Sirius back, but now…

"And…?" Peter had to ask again, missing on Sirius's clue.

"Like I said – it's the answer to your dreams," Sirius apparently wanted to keep his present as a surprise, even after he delivered it. "Before you go to sleep tonight, just think of whom you like and say the charm. I'm not saying anything more," he laughed again, seeing the funny expression on the faces of his three best friends.

Night came more slowly than usual for the foursome. Peter was anxious to try out his curious gift, and decided to go to bed early, leaving the three others in the common room, studying. To be precise, Remus was the only one studying. James was tending to his broom, waxing the handle and trimming stray hairs from the tail, and Sirius was… well, Sirius was doing what he normally did at night - snogging a girl, this time one of the fifth-years. From time to time, James lifted his head and gazed at Lily, who was sitting across the room.

"Good luck with that, Wormtail; you'll thank me again in the morning!" Sirius called after Peter when he left.

"I can't believe you're not telling us what's with his present," complained James to Sirius bitterly.

"I'll tell you now, if you want," said Sirius, getting up from the love seat he had shared with the girl – who looked very disappointed - and walking towards James and Remus.

"It's a spell that makes you dream about the girl you thought about before you fell asleep," he whispered to them. They looked at each other and then back at him.

"What do you mean 'dream about a girl'?" asked Remus suspiciously.

"Yeah, Padfoot – what kind of a dream?" James narrowed his eyes.

"You know what kind of a dream." Sirius leaned back on the sofa, looking very satisfied with himself.

"Oh, no," said Remus. "Do you know what it will do to Peter?"

"Of course, that's the whole idea!" Sirius completely missed the point.

_Poor Peter_, thought Remus– _he'll never be able to look in the girl's eyes after a dream that was designed by Sirius_.

"If someone's interested in a girl, he doesn't need your help dreaming about her at night." James started closing his broom service kit.

"Prongs, we all know that you're dreaming about Lily every night," Sirius said very loudly, loud enough to make Lily look to James's direction with an unreadable expression on her face. James smacked Sirius' head rather harshly with the service kit, a panicked expression on his face, and Sirius continued more quietly, "but Peter's probably too shy even in his dreams. So I thought I'll give him a little help." Sirius smiled knowingly.

"Sirius, I have a feeling you'll regret that thought," said Remus, returning to his 'How to Get Rid of a Werewolf in Ten Days' essay they had been given that day. For some reason, he was having trouble with it.

"What can possibly go wrong?" Sirius threw back at them, returning to his girl with a smug smile on his face.

"I wish he hadn't said that," said Remus, and James, who was eyeing Lily, turned to him and said, "come on, Moony, it's just a dream!"

The next morning Sirius surprised everyone again and got up first. Not able to wait for everyone to wake up by themselves, he immediately yelled "Good Morning!" to the room and jumped on James's still body in the closest bed.

"Getoffmeyouidiot!" screamed a very shocked James, and pushed Sirius off.

"Well?" asked Sirius from the floor as soon as Peter, because of all the noise, opened his bed curtains.

"Well what?" Peter smiled slyly, and when Sirius threw a slipper at him he added, "All right, all right. It was great! You have a very dirty mind, Padfoot."

Sirius's smile grew even bigger. "I told you he'd like it," he said to Remus, with an air of triumph. "So can we have the details?" He turned to Peter again.

"No!" James and Remus called together. Peter looked reluctant about the idea as well.

"It's bad enough that we have to listen to you going on about girls," said James, "I don't need to hear Peter as well, especially about something that didn't really happen."

"It could happen, though!" Peter called, suddenly insulted.

"Then when it does, tell us about it," James commented and in an afterthought added "if you want, that is." He himself didn't have any intention to share something that intimate if Lily was involved. Especially if they'd ever start dating.

Remus thought these kinds of talks about girls were inappropriate, and didn't participate in this one. He busied himself getting ready for the day, only half listening to the conversation.

"I think I'll use that spell tonight myself," Sirius said out loud, and when Peter jumped from his bed, protesting that it was _his_ birthday present, he added "It's a spell! More than one can use it, you know!"

"I have no idea why you'd need something like that," Remus finally joined in the conversation, fully clothed and ready for lessons. "I think you get enough action as it is," he smiled slyly, not at all like his usual self.

"Don't worry," Sirius sighed exaggeratedly, "I won't regret it."

"Stop saying stuff like that." Remus headed towards the door, "and be careful what you wish for."

The next morning being Saturday, only James, who had Quidditch practice, got up early. Remus got up just in time to catch breakfast, before heading back to the common room to finish his essay.

When Sirius and Peter finally woke up, it was past noon.

"I had the most amazing dream!" Sirius was lying on his bed, eyes closed.

"Me too!" sighed Peter contently.

Sirius' head turned to him with a smile. "I knew you'd love the present!" he said. "Prongs and Moony thought that it'd get us into trouble."

"What can go wrong with dreaming?" Peter laughed heartily. "By the way, not that I'm complaining, but the dreams are pretty tiring. Can you give me the counter-spell? You know – just if I'll want the night off or something."

"What do you mean 'counter-spell'?" asked Sirius cautiously. "The spell supposed to last only one night."

"But I didn't use it last night," claimed Peter.

Sirius laughed. "Well, I guess you're easily affected – the dream from last night must have lingered on," he said and Peter joined in his amusement.

"Are you two coming?" asked James, standing in the doorway, waiting for Remus to finish collecting his belongings and go down to breakfast with him.

"Nah… you go ahead," replied Sirius absentmindedly.

As soon as the two disappeared from the room, Peter's head popped out of the bathroom. "Padfoot, it's been a week!" he said angrily.

"I know!" Sirius almost barked. "I'm working on it."

"Moony's getting suspicious," warned Peter. "He asked me yesterday what we were up to and why both of us look so tired lately, and why, for Merlin's sake, did you spend the entire weekend in the library – Lily told him she spotted you there."

"Oh, Merlin." Sirius looked unhappy indeed. "What did you tell him?"

"I said that you were with that girl from Ravenclaw. I think he believed me."

"Good. I'll think of something, don't worry, Wormtail." Sirius sounded very desperate.

"I thought you, of all people, would love dreaming about what you do in reality," said Peter. "How come you're more bothered by that than I am?" he asked.

"Because I, unlike you, am thinking about more than one girl before I go to sleep, and therefore I, unlike you, am dreaming about more than one girl – it's more tiring. And besides, I have a dirtier mind." Peter was laughing so hard that Sirius managed a smile as well just from looking at him.

"Well you, unlike me, are responsible for this mess, so you, unlike me, will have to figure it out, and soon please," said Peter, serious again.

"I know. I hate to say it, but Remus was right about the dream. We might need him to help us find the counter spell, 'cause this is getting ridiculous. I'm running out of underpants!"

"So this is what's been going on with you two," Remus smirked. _That sounds very out of place somehow_, thought Sirius. "You two _were_ acting very peculiar lately."

"I know, I can barely concentrate in lessons anymore," said Peter, playing his chessmen against Remus. "Well, even less than I used to, anyway," he added truthfully.

"Forget that!" Sirius collapsed on his bed, stuffed from dinner. "I have a reputation to maintain! I haven't snogged any girls lately, and I heard one of those forth-years saying that I might be in love!"

"Oh, well, that _is_ dreadful," said James with sarcasm. Sirius always found James's behavior around Lily very amusing, much like the rest of the school, so James didn't feel too sorry for him right now.

"I didn't think there was anything in the world that can prevent you from spending time with girls," said Remus, looking curiously at Sirius.

"Yeah, well, with the dream thing, I have enough to do with girls," said Sirius bitterly.

"Maybe it's the other way around," contemplated James out loud.

"What do you mean?" Sirius asked and then sighed. If there was anything he could do about it…It wasn't the regular dreams that bothered Sirius, but the fact that they replaced his reality.

"Maybe if you'll get some real action, you wouldn't be dreaming at night," James wriggled his eyebrows suggestively. "You'll be too exhausted, you know."

"Hey, that could work!" Sirius sat up straight, sounding excited. "Alright then, don't bother me tonight when you go to sleep."

"Fine, fine," murmured Remus, "just don't forget to put up the silencing charm like last time."

"Yeah, Padfoot, we also need our beauty sleep," said James, smirking.

The next morning, Remus was the one that got up first – much earlier than usual for some reason. He tried to be as quiet as he could while dressing, and was not at all surprised to see the hangings closed around Sirius's bed.

Sirius entertained girls in his bed too often for Remus's liking, but he couldn't do anything about it. After all, he hoped that when - and being a werewolf, if - he got an opportunity to do the same, the others wouldn't mind.

He sighed to himself and turned to go to the bathroom, and at that moment, the bathroom door opened and Sirius exited from the room, looking very upset.

"What's wrong?" whispered Remus.

Sirius was looking pale and embarrassed. "It didn't work."

"What do you mean?" Remus eyed him and then looked at Sirius's bed. "You still had the dream even after you've been with… ah, with whom have you been, actually?"

"It doesn't matter, she's already left… and I mean that _it_ didn't work," Sirius averted his eyes from Remus's eyes to his lower body parts and back again.

"Oh," was all Remus managed to say. Well, that was definitely a first for Sirius, as far as he knew.

"What am I going to do, Moony?" Sirius sounded really desperate now.

"Look, we'll think of something," Remus whispered back to him, trying to sound encouraging.

"Have you found something, Moony?" Sirius demanded as soon as he saw Remus entering the common room. Remus has spent the entire day in the library, instead of enjoying the sun in the grounds with the rest of them.

"I have a few leads, but nothing concrete," was Remus's reply. "But what I'd like to know is what _you_ were doing while I was trying to solve _your_ problem."

"I played some Quidditch with Prongs." Sirius didn't sound too sorry, "but thanks again for helping."

"It'll go a lot faster if you'll help!" Remus said bluntly.

"But I'm rubbish at looking up things in the library!" Sirius cried. "I've been there all last week and didn't come up with anything!"

"Well, I think I have a good motivation for you to make a better effort," said Remus. "I've heard a rumor today about you."

"What kind of rumor?" Sirius eyed him suspiciously.

"Apparently someone has been telling her friends that you weren't _up_ to the occasion the other night, if you know what I mean."

"WHAT?" Sirius roared. "It was just that one time and it happens to every bloke and –" and then he realized that they weren't alone and everybody in the room was staring at him. His face lost what little color it had possessed. "Moony, please don't tell me that this rumor has already reached the entire school," whispered Sirius.

"I'm afraid so." Remus was serious. He knew that Sirius might not take the news so well, but never imagined him to look so unconfident and shamed. That was not at all the Sirius he knew. "Come with me to the library and help." Turning to Peter, he added, "You should come too, Peter. It's your problem as well. How come I'm doing all the work?"

James laughed. "So I'm the only one that will be able to enjoy my free hours?"

"No," Sirius said, "not once you'll find out that I'm also dreaming about Lily."

"YOU WHAT?" roared James. "How dare you?" he jumped up from his seat, ready to punch Sirius.

"Relax, James!" Remus stood up and grabbed him from behind.

"He's dreaming about Lily!" James whispered, a horrified expression on his face.

"Well, it's your own fault," Sirius said without smiling, "I heard you mutter her name in your sleep when I went to bed last night, so obviously she was on my mind when I fell asleep. Besides," he continued, "it only happened one time."

James was still looking furious, but tried to convince himself that it wasn't really Sirius's fault. Well, actually it was, when he thought about it – if it wasn't for his stupid present idea…his fists clenched.

"Sirius, where did you write all your drafts when you invented the spell?" Remus tried to cool down their spirits. The sooner they solved the problem, the better.

"In my history of magic book," Sirius was careful not to look away from James, who still looked like he'd love to jump on him and beat him up.

"Of course," said Remus sarcastically. "A spare piece of parchment is so hard to come by, so you _had_ to graffiti your book."

"No, it was in history of magic lesson when I came up with the idea," answered Sirius nonchalantly.

He leaned towards his schoolbag and then handed Remus a book that looked like it had been used by at least five other students in the past. Remus sighed to himself, knowing that Sirius never had to buy second-hand books, or anything else for that matter, and therefore never gave a second thought about treating his belongings with care.

"Page 69," Sirius said with glee. "I thought that would inspire me in the inventing process," he said defensively when Remus gave him a fierce look. And again, Remus had to sigh - _Will Sirius ever grow up?_

Sirius went back to watch James and Peter who continued their wizard chess game, every once in a while James sending a bitter look towards Sirius. When Remus opened the book at the right page, he was surprised to see that Sirius was uncharacteristically organized when he invented the dream-spell. He drew up a table along the margins of the page, in one column the spells he thought of, mostly in Latin, and in the others what had worked and what were the effects. His brow wrinkled.

"Sirius, did you try all these spells on yourself?" Remus lifted his eyes from the book.

"Of course," was Sirius's reply. "How was I to know which one would work?"

Remus turned a few pages in the book "Do you know why you didn't continue having the dreams after you've tried out the spell that you ended up giving Peter?" He asked Sirius.

"No," Sirius frowned and contemplated. "Mmmm, I didn't think about it."

"Well, you just didn't think, period." Remus closed the book and leaned back into the couch. "Could it be because you've invented a counter-spell to go along with the spell?"

"Nah… I didn't invent a counter-spell," Sirius dismissed him with his hand.

"Oh, but you did," Remus informed him, and Peter's jaw dropped. James started laughing.

"No, I didn't," Sirius insisted.

"Really?" Remus handed him the book back. "Check for yourself."

Sirius reached his hand to the book, but Peter was quicker. He snatched the book from Remus's hand and opened it hastily. His eyes scanned the page quickly, and when they got to the end of the page, which was full of Sirius's tryouts, they froze on the words "counter-spells – p. 96", that were emphasized with two bold lines beneath them.

"'Counter-spells - page 96'," quoted Remus. "Does it ring any bells?"

The look of comprehension that spread across Sirius's face made James fall to the floor, laughing uncontrollably. Remus himself thought that it was worth spending so much time in the library. Well, almost.

The only one that didn't take it very well was Peter. With a loud cry that resembled an Indian war-cry, he jumped on Sirius, knocking him to the floor, and started pounding the book he was still holding into Sirius's head.

"YOU BLISTERING IDIOT!" he screamed, while Sirius tried to protect himself, surprised by Peter's outburst, and Remus tried to stop him. "Do you know what you made me go through? I fell asleep in the common room last night, and Benjamin from seventh-year was there!"

"That can't be that bad," Remus was trying to get some sense into him. "When I got back from my Prefect duty, both of you were the only ones there, so even if you were making, ah…sounds, I'm sure that he would have understood," he tried to suppress a smile.

"Yeah," cried Peter bitterly as he pounded the book against Sirius's head one last time, "but he's the one I was dreaming of all the time!"


End file.
